Well been having an interesting time to say the least since I last wrote my blog. Marcus was great off school, much calmer we both learnt loads in a very informal manner and generally enjoyed being together. We were advised that we probably wouldn,t get funding for the special school and i was told by education welfare to make ammends with school and send him back. She was abit nosy asking about the support i had, did i work, what was the twins behaviour like etc. I felt she was trying to point the blaim at me and my inadequate parenting skills, where do these people get off judging others lifestyles. We had a meeting at school and it was decided Marcus should have a phased return to school with the ASD team taking him to school and him leaving early to get a quieter bus. Marcus not too thrilled by this idea but agreed to give it a go. I am definately not impressed what part of my son cannot cope in this school do they not get. Anyway I sent him on Monday as planned, neither of us slept on Sunday night and actually getting him out of the door was a nightmare, he claimed he didn,t know how to pack his bag, basically used evry excuse under the sun. When he came home he appeared anxious and said he had a horrible day but told his Nanna he had a fantastic day. He later told me he doesn,t want to upset or worry her and he also won,t tell school how he feels as they are trying so hard to make it work he doesn,t want to let them down. The following day we had a very chilled day, we went to the allotment, and here he opened up while we were weeding, how he is so unhappy at school, he feels anxious and scared all the time. I really felt for him but didn,t know what to do. This morning he refused to get out of bed, and when he did was very anxious, still not ready when the ASD team came to collect after much persuading he went to school. After the stressful morning I decided if he was so stressed out I wouldn,t send him tomorrow and seriously consider home education while we fought for a special school place. However true to form he came home from school having had a good day and said he wants to give it another go at his present school. this will all change tomorrow so I am still writing the letter to the LEA tonight requesting a change of provision to a special school. Will hold off on home education for the time being but definately a consideration.
Lydia is settling back into school and happy doing her homework etc, Piers continues to be a challenge. We are waiting on the educational psychologist seeing him but one of the LSAs at school also agree with me that he has difficulties. Why cant things be simple, his teacher thinks he is just immature and his consultant thinks he is naughty and attention seeking and doesn,t even agree the condition i think he has exists. Apparently i can pay for a private assessment to be done if I had a spare 3 thousand hanging around but don,t have a spare £3 to be honest. He had the most amazing tantrum tonight because he was losing on the Wii, i turned it off and he started shouting at me and calling me a stupid girl does this sound like a normal 4 year old. After 1 term at school he can,t write or recognise his name, has no interest in learning anything, can,t count to ten and doesn,t appear to know his colours. I think most of it is a case of won,t do it rather than can,t but I am sure with time a diagnosis will come. Luckily the twins are at a very small supportive school with a fantastic SENCO so he will be OK hopefully.
Miles is on call tonight and i have jsut got the little ones to sleep and Marcus is in the bath so hopefully some peace soon. We have an appointment at CAMHS tomorrow and then the education welfare officer is coming to visit with the educational psychologist, just let them dare to say i am a bad parent as i am ready for them. Hopefully not so long till I next log in but life is busy here as you can see.